I can’t tell you how many times I have intentions of blogging every week or every other week, and if you have been following me, you know that I ventured into vlogging and posted a couple videos. I was going to do that every week, anddddddddd I made it two weeks. I love blogging but don’t make the time for it. I have so many things to say about my journey or motherhood but I don’t make it a priority. I put everything else first and put this on the back burner. Even when I know God is calling me to write or vlog. And you know what? I am tired of putting this on the back burner.
I know that when I started my blog 2 years ago, it wasn’t because I like talking about myself. It was because I had a genuine desire and fire in me to share my journey through maternal mental illness and now, motherhood. I know God has called me to blog and speak out for a reason. But God has taken me one step further and this past month, after months and months of making excuses and trying to duck His calling, I have enrolled back into school to pursue my Masters in Counseling. I know my life calling is to be a therapist that specializes in postpartum mood disorders.
I know that my struggles weren’t for nothing. While I still don’t understand why He chose me, He did. God handpicked me and the struggles I went through and now, I get the opportunity to bring glory to His kingdom and help other mamas with their struggles.
I am most excited about 2018 because for the first time in 2 1/2 years, I am not struggling with a postpartum mood disorder. I am free, happy and in love with life again. It doesn’t mean I don’t have moments where I want to run away from the madness, but I am able to see beyond the madness now. I am able to see hope and the beauty that is in my family. I am able to see the blessings that God has given me, even though I don’t feel worthy of it.
As I embark on the next chapter of my life that God has written for my life, I am nervous but excited at the same time. For the first time in a long time, I have my confidence back. I have faith in myself. I believe in myself. And I am ready to move mountains and change lives.
So here is to the new year, a new chapter and a new outlook on life.
Happy New Year Everyone!
Rae